Yes, some plastic surgeons want you think your “resting bitch face” is a medical disorder.
Bitchy Resting Face. Resting Bitch Face. Whatever you want to to call it, we thought the insult that was one step removed from catcalling and street harassment had been turned on its head by this viral video.
Many women embraced the comic meme as a way to say, “Hey, dudes, we don’t have to be smiling all the time. So step off.” Even some celebs have turned to humor for a Bitchy Resting face fix:
Is there a filter on Instagram that fixes Bitchy Resting Face? Asking for a friend.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) July 25, 2014
But you know there are always people trying to find a new way to make a buck on women’s insecurities about themselves, even in this era of Dove commercials and anti-Victoria’s Secret ads. Seeing an opportunity, some plastic surgeons are on the lookout for new patients by claiming that “BRF” is an actual medical disorder. It must be one, according to a “news release” recently received at The Broad Side, because the TODAY show says it is!
According to the physician, who shall remain unnamed, if you have these “symptoms” you may have the dreaded bitchy resting face that, of course, he can “cure” with a little tweaking here and there:
Thin lips that make you look mean, old and stern,
Lines or folds around the mouth (we usually call those laugh lines) transform you into someone unapproachable, unfriendly, harsh, and scowling,
Those “non-open” looking eyes (yeah, we’re a little tired) make you look shifty, uninterested, apathetic, and boring,
And those “deep folds” between your eyes (aka the “11”) mean you’re angry, grouchy, stern, and scolding.
Funny … those all sounds like features you find on your face after you’ve lived more than two decades. So “bitchy resting face” is really just about aging and turning a pop culture moment into a fast track for new clients who are afraid that others will find them overly stern, shifty or grouchy?
We’ve given this attempt to make women feel bad about themselves a lot of thought here at TBS. And we realized there are some other, more sensible cures for “BRF” and they don’t involve surgery or anesthesia. They can be implemented with a minimum of pain, and while they might not make us look different, we would definitely feel less mean, stern and grouchy:
Dismantle the patriarchy and give women a real reason to smile,
Invent a cure for menopause,
Teach location and manipulation of the clitoris in sex ed,
Pay us equal wages,
Stop telling us to smile,
Invent a painless mammogram,
Quit calling us “baby and sweetie,“
Invent a libido booster (or, alternately, put the toilet seat down),
Require all broadcasters to comment more on the hairstyles, wardrobe, marital status, parental status, age, and sex appeal of all male candidates for office,
Give us a solidly feminist Wonder Woman movie or a solo Black Widow one, and
End gender reveal parties.
We’re sure there are plenty more. But we’re sure that feeling better about those things might at least soften up the ever deepening “11s” on our foreheads … when we don’t have a need for that BRF, that is!